Finding Self-Worth Beyond the Classroom

by Mindy Boyd

As parents, we all want what is best for our children. We want them to be the best in school, church, and in their communities. In order for this to happen, we often feel the pressure to get them involved, motivate them when they are not motivated, and hold their feet to the fire. After all, they are just kids; what do they know about the big world and all its demands? While all of these feelings have a place, I wonder if we unintentionally become those parents whose children feel that they can never win.

I started thinking about my own interactions with my daughter after attending the “Parenting Children on Sexuality” seminar a few weeks ago. Dr. Harper so poignantly stated that one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is to help them know unequivocally that they are loved and, most importantly, that their lives matter eternally.

Now most of you are probably thinking that your children know that you love them and that the Lord loves them beyond their imagination. I would agree with you and feel confident that my children feel loved and understand God’s love for them is never-ending. However, there are always opportunities to make sure our children hear daily that the Lord loves them, we love them, we believe in them, and that they are smart!

It is so easy for our children to base their self-worth solely on their experiences in school and how they measure up to their peers. We all remember what school was like and understand that at times it is tough for our children to deal with their peers and to keep a positive attitude when they don’t understand a concept or fail a test. Every child wants to be successful!

Can I encourage you to help your children see their self-worth beyond the classroom? When we provide a safe-haven for our children and they feel that we believe in them, we arm them with the greatest defense to handle the “hiccups” they may experience in school and eventually in the big world. They need us to be their biggest fan!

I’ll leave you with this simple yet powerful statement from my dear friend, Dede Toney, in her book, Don’t Erase The Board, “You are brilliant, I believe in you, don’t ever give up, and you matter to me.”  When our children begin to see their self-worth through our eyes, they can begin to internalize their own self-worth.